Dear Reader----
‘Twas the other day that I had been presiding
over another meeting of my MeetUp group, known as the Amateur Shakespeare Society, when there came in among
us Mr. Brockden’s cousin, Mackenzie, who was one of those obnoxious gentlemen who
think they can pass in society as candid and plain-speaking, who excuse their rudeness
by claiming to be merely speaking the truth. Mack (as he is called) is, in
short, a lively, impudent clown, and has wit enough to make him a pleasant
companion, had it been polished and rectified by good manners.
It had not been a half hour before Mack
proceeded to set the ladies a-blushing and insult the gentlemen. He asked Miss
Carrington if her wit had yet got her husband; and he plied her that since she
looked a little wan under the eyes, there was no sense in brooking any more
delay in securing a husband. He told Mr. Lismahago that ‘twas unfortunate Mr.
Lismahago could not make a farthing every time he spoke some dull cliché,
for he would then be filthy rich indeed, as he always desired to be. He told Miss Farquhar that ‘twas better to leave
her nails undone than to put up with such sloppy handling of the paint-job
herself; and if she could not afford a professional manicurist, she most certainly
would benefit from fingernails au naturel.
He delivered himself to Mr. Byrd upon
the advantages of a ploughman’s lunch over that of a gourmand’s, suggesting to
him the need for a leaner physique. I must confess he put me out of countenance
with his rudeness, so that I made some excuse, and left the room. Some my
friends were less than pleased with Mackenzie’s company as well.
This fellow’s behavior made me reflect on the
usefulness of complaisance, to make all conversation agreeable. This quality gives
luster to every talent a man can be possessed of. It renders a superior
amiable, an equal agreeable, and an inferior acceptable. It produces
good-nature and mutual benevolence, encourages the socially timorous, humbles
the monopolizer of conversations, and differentiates civilized persons from a
confusion of savages.
Universal complaisance is necessary to make all
conversations more than merely tolerable, but enjoyable too. Without
complaisance, a clever wit becomes a cynical dog, like the scabrous Thersites; a
discerning philosopher becomes a raging misanthrope; a courtly lover becomes a wretched
libertine.
So important is this notion of complaisance
that it behooves young people to cultivate the habit as early in their
lives as possible. Therefore, Mothers, teach your Daughters to laugh at their
future husband’s jokes. Fathers, teach your Boys the proper ways to compliment
women’s features, especially their eyes, noses, lips, and cheekbones. Most
importantly, Parents, introduce your children to the novels of yours truly, Mr.
Samuel Richardson, and to the essays of Mr. Joseph Addison, wherein they will
read more about the importance of universal complaisance.